I dropped off my little boo last Monday at daycare and she cried. Usually she is happy to go which makes it less stressful for me. That day, she wanted mommy.
I drove away feeling upset. I felt alone in my car and a little lost. I pulled up to a stoplight on the way to work and noticed a mom in her car with an empty car seat in the back.
She looked lonely too as she stared off into space until the light changed. We drove our separate ways. I couldn’t help but wonder what she was thinking about.
It felt lonely driving into work that day. I missed my little boo and I started wondering why I was working in the first place.
I received an email from a mom who read my blog. She described how she felt better knowing someone else out there was struggling with managing it all and how my blog helped her that day. She truly made my day.
At the end of the email, the last statement described how after finding my blog, she knew she was not alone.
That really hit home for me. I began to wonder how many other women feel they are alone with the challenges they face being working moms.
- Do you have those days when you cry following daycare drop off, questioning the choices you make and feeling the working mom guilt?
- Do you have those days when the overwhelm makes you want to scream or cry?
- Do you have those days or weeks when you feel stuck in your job, want to throw in the towel and ponder how to make a change?
You are not alone.
We all have those moments, days and even weeks that feel endlessly tough. It could be an issue that is situational and will pass in time. It’s very easy to let that little voice from within tell us about all of the bad things we are doing. The negative.
We believe it sometimes, but it’s false. It can paralyze us though and hold us back from taking steps forward.
So, what to do?
Albert Einstein made a good point when he said,
“In the middle of every difficulty lies opportunity.”
Create Your Opportunity Map
1) Pull out a piece of paper and draw out three columns.
2) Column 1 – Title it “The Difficult” and list each “difficulty” you are facing (which can also be thought of as the negative triggers).
3) Column 2 – Title it “The Opportunity”. Beginning with the first “difficulty” you noted in Column 1, take time to evaluate each item and think about the “opportunity” (i.e. the positive you can identify within each difficulty.
4) Column 3 – Title it “The Action Step”. Identity the actions you can take to change or improve the situation. It may be just making a slight tweak or you may plan a major overhaul. Either way, taking action and a step forward will help reduce the stress and turn your perspective into a more productive once. Create your opportunity!
My little boo’s drop off didn’t go so well last week which triggered the guilt and loneliness feelings.
That experience provided the opportunity to share this with you and I also mapped out some action steps for the future as well.
Taking the time to evaluate the difficulty was a step in the right direction and I found some opportunity along the way!
What opportunities can you find?
8 thoughts on “You Are Not Alone”
Some days are definitely harder than others! Great post. I’m so thankful to work around lots of women who support me and make me laugh when I’m having a rough day.
That is awesome to have the support around you at work! Makes the tough days seem not as tough 🙂
What a great post!
The Working Home Keeper
Thank you Mary Ellen!
Due to changes in the economy I have gone back to work full time in an office. I was working before, but from a home office so I had total control/flexibility in my day. I have been at this job for a little over a year and FINALLY just recently stopped feeling so lousy about it. The guilt, the sadness, knowing my kids will only be small once and I am missing so much. Honestly, what made me turn my attitude around is “being positive” as you say and hopeful, knowing if this isn’t exactly where I want to be, that I can will myself to change. Being more positive and opening up myself to other opportunities rather than wallowing in my less than ideal situation will get me where I need to be!
Sometimes the transition into something new can feel like it has turned things upside down, too. Sounds like you are in a different place moving into new things. There’s always opportunities out there, even if it means moving on from what we are doing. Some of the best things take some time but are well worth it once we get there. 🙂 Thank you for your comment!
Wow, I’m laying here at night feeling so sad, overwhelmed, guilty about being such a busy, working mom (and jealous of my sister who’s a stay-at-home mom). This website and this article makes me feel better already though. It’s just nice to know that other moms feel the same way & that there’s a community on this site. Thanks for creating this website.
I’m so happy to hear you are feeling better! I still have those moments too… it can all feel like it’s so hard, but that is when it’s the best time to practice a perspective check. We are not alone in this by any means and that’s why supporting one another is so important! 🙂